Top Ten Chilling Children By Don Normann

10) PET SEMATARY Yes, folks, Stephen King makes the list not one, but three times (and don’t be surprised if you see him multiple times on future lists, too! He da MANNN!!!) In most respects, PET SEMATARY managed to capture the gloom and ominous feel of the book, as Louis Creed (Dale Midkiff) moves his family out to a nice house in the Maine countryside, with just two ‘little’ things wrong with it…a busy link to the freeway that runs out front, and a motley pet cemetery in the back. Oh, and did I happen to mention that the Creeds have a rambunctious toddler named Gage (Miko Hughes)? Hey, it’s King…do the math. Now, here’s the thing. Everything about the movie works, especially the performances from Midkiff, STAR TREK’S Denise Crosby as his wife and the late, great Fred Gwynne (THE MUNSTERS) as Jud Crandall, the kindly neighbor who gets the film’s tagline (“Sometimes…dead is better.”) Unfortunately, when poor, dead Gage returns as a snarling demon from Hell-or-Wherever, it’s a moment the audience has to be sold on or else the whole movie falls apart. And Hughes at the time was just too gosh-darn cute to be evil, even when he slaughters two of the main characters. And as much as CGI can do today for horror movies when used properly, I think it still would’ve looked pretty fake back then if the technology had been available. Nevertheless, we are still talking about a possessed toddler here, which is STILL a spooktacular idea, and though the film stumbles with Weaver playing Gage, it still gets back on its feet just in time to deliver a horrific ending, extremely faithful to the book. 9) CHILDREN OF THE CORN Okay, so ‘corniness’ gets literal in yet another big-screen treatment of a King short story, made so long ago that its stars, Peter Horton and Linda Hamilton, weren’t even “names” yet. (‘thirtysomething’ and THE TERMINATOR lie waiting for them in the not-too-distant future). The story of kids gone wild and religion gone rancid was hardly anything new (for similar tales, once again go back to Tom Tryon’s “Harvest Home”, or go back even further to Shirley Jackson’s “The Lottery”). But what certainly made the low-budget doings a lot scarier were the full-out performances of two members of the supporting cast: John Franklin and Courtney Gains. Gains, (playing Malachi) with his stop-sign red hair and perpetual scowl looks like he could’ve played the movie’s main boogeyman, “He-Who-Walks-Behind-The-Rows”, but Franklin, born with a disease that makes you look much younger than you are, was Isaac, the nightmare-worthy ‘prophet’ and ringleader of the creepy kids, and the one actor from the movie that everybody remembered, even if they didn’t recall who the stars were. I don’t think I’d seen a movie where an actor had used his affliction to his advantage so well, since Michael Berryman appeared in THE HILLS HAVE EYES (that’s the original, kidz, not the remake). 8) THE RING We Americans have been “borrowing” a lot of our plots from foreign films for some time now, but if one film could be cited for starting the wave of Americanized “J-Horror” movies, this is it. As good as the original version was, there’s a lot to be said for the remake, and not just because of the ramped-up special effects. Pre-teen terror comes of age here, as the archetypal evil little kid – in this case, Samara – can concentrate her dark powers so well, that they’re transferred to video tape…and anyone who sees the tape will die in seven days. It probably sounds a lot cornier than how it comes across when you see it, and I know some people who saw this and said they laughed through most of it. But anyone who says they didn’t get goosebumps from the scene where Samara climbs through the TV set as she goes after a victim, is the same person who probably says they never masturbate. LIAR!!! 7) THE GOOD SON If you always suspected, after the number he did on Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern in HOME ALONE, that Macaulay Culkin could convincingly play an evil little shit, give yourself a big pat on the back…your suspicions are confirmed with this movie. Elijah Wood, too short and still too young to be a Hobbit at this point, plays Mark, whose mother has just died from cancer, and he’s come to stay with his relatives, including his cousin Henry (MC). At first glance, Henry doesn’t seem like a bad kid, but Mark gradually becomes more and more aware of his cousin’s bid to become “Rhoda-Penmark-with-a-penis.” Not only has Henry possibly done some really bad shit before Mark’s arrival (like killing his younger brother), but besides having some terrifying plans for the rest of his family, the little fucker is determined to take Mark out of the picture in order to keep his secret, when he’s not blaming his innocent cousin for the vile pranks he’s been pulling. And even worse, where the original “Bad Seed” used murder as a means to an end to get what she wanted, Culkin’s Henry is doing bad things just because…he LIKES it. BRRRRRR!!!! 6) ALICE SWEET ALICE Gee whiz! People suspect you of killing your little sister and trying to burn her body in a church during mass, and suddenly everybody wants to blame shit on you for EVERYTHING! Paula Sheppard (a cult figure later on thanks to the punk sci-fi hit LIQUID SKY) plays Alice, a troubled little girl born into a devoutly Catholic Italian family that was maybe a little TOO devoutly Catholic. Alfred Sole plays on some of the creepiness associated with churches and religious iconography and ramps it up, as family members start to turn up slashed or slaughtered, and Alice gets to take the rap. But does she deserve it? You guessed it - I’m not gonna tell you! Also notable for the fact that Brooke Shields makes her debut as the baby sister in the shocking opening. (I think Drew Barrymore lasted longer in SCREAM!) 5) THE OTHER And speaking of twins, if you never saw this one, watch for it on cable, or just grab it on DVD. Based on yet another great novel, this time by Thomas Tryon, it’s the story of identical twins, their bond with their grandmother, (played by acting giant Uta Hagen), and the “game” that the twins sometimes play both with her and each other; a game that’s going to cost some people their lives. Directed with a subtle touch by Robert Mulligan from Tryon’s script, it was released during a time when a good “twist ending” could still provide a couple of unexpected shocks, and there’s a great supporting cast that includes Diana Muldaur, Victor French and a very young John Ritter. 4) THE SHINING Not all of Terror’s Tykes had to be inherently evil; they just had to attract it for one reason or another, and it’s the psychic abilities of little Danny Torrance (Danny Lloyd) that awakens the dark energy of a malevolent hotel in Stanley Kubrick’s controversial version of the Stephen King classic. Kubrick and writer Diane Johnson were less concerned with the supernatural aspects of the tale than the story of a family’s slow dissolution into madness and murder, thanks to a balls-to-the-wall performance by Jack Nicholson as Danny’s deranged daddy, Jack Torrance. Shelley Duvall was unfortunately miscast, but having the late, great Scatman Crothers as equally psychically gifted caretaker Dick Halloran kind of evened things out. Not to mention an assload of atmosphere captured within the Elstree and Pinewood Studios sets in England, and a pair of ghostly twins that gave everyone nightmares for weeks. “Come and play with us…forever…and EVER…and EVER…” 3) THE OMEN The Devil makes for big box-office receipts, and with the ‘one-two punch’ success of ROSEMARY’S BABY and THE EXORCIST, suddenly every studio wanted Beelzebub to be their “babydaddy.” Well, Fox got pregnant next, with director Richard Donner and writer David Seltzer as the midwives of this marvelous little monster. Gregory Peck and Lee Remick weren’t cracking smile-one at the plotline; they took this shit seriously, and therefore, so did the audience. Harvey Stephens was the perfect choice to play the Anti-Christ as a toddler, and David Warner and Leo McKern are among the unfortunate people who learn about him and wish they hadn’t. As for memorable scenes, this one’s chockful of ‘em, but the kitchen battle between Peck and Billie Whitelaw’s deranged Mrs. Blaylock stayed with me for a very long time. Saw the remake, hated it, and if you go back to the original, you’ll see why it was totally unnecessary. 2) ROSEMARY'S BABY Without this one, there would’ve been no Regan McNeil or Damien Thorn. I mean, how bad do you have to be to raise this much literal Hell in your parents’ lives, and you’re not even born yet? This Roman Polanski masterpiece about big-city paranoia, nosy neighbors and strange green milkshakes starred Mia Farrow and John Cassavetes, as nervous newlyweds who move into a big ole brownstone apartment in Manhattan (actually the Dakota). Oh! And did I happen to mention after the milkshakes, that there’s a touch of Satanism thrown in? The Ira Levin novel was prime material for the times, and if I recall correctly, this was the last movie that Polanski made before Mrs. Polanski, a.k.a. Sharon Tate, went to an informal party in L.A. on Cielo Drive…and never came back. 1) THE BAD SEED If we’re gonna talk killer kiddies in the horror genre, we’d better start with the ‘OG’ of them all. Patty McCormack as Rhoda Penmark was sunshine and pigtails, but this ‘mutha’ of all daughters was one badass little bitch. You didn’t EVER want to get on her bad side, and the best way to do that was not giving her whatever she wanted, when she wanted it. Just ask that little classmate of hers who won that penmanship medal…oh, that’s right, you can’t. He’s DEAD. Well, what about Leroy, the family handyman? Uggghh, let’s skip that subject, too. Anyway, the movie, adapted from the Sherwood Anderson play by John Lee Mahin, was pretty radical and controversial for its time, and if you know anything about it, you know that the censors didn’t allow producer/director Mervyn LeRoy or Warner’s to go with the play’s chilling original ending. Still, even if it is a cop-out, the movie’s ending is a doozy, too, on its own merits. (And no – if you haven’t seen it, I’m not gonna tell you what it is! Find out on your own…or I’ll tell Rhoda on you, and THEN you’ll be sorry!) And you gotta love that outstanding score by Alex North. Honorable Mentions: VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED, THE CHILDREN, LORD OF THE FLIES, THE DEVIL’S BACKBONE, WICKED LITTLE THINGS, THE OTHERS, THE INNOCENTS.