With the first six months of 2012 in the books, we are now in the final home drive for film releases with 26 weeks left for movie studios to amuse, amaze and entertain its box office public. 

The second half of a release year is typically my favourite.  July always brings some large big budgeted blockbusters.  August traditionally throws us those films that are still quite good but studios held back as not to compete with the big May to July features.  September is always a wasteland for movies as kids go back to school and studios are happy with $15 million openings.  But October brings us our Halloween horror fare and November and December are the months where the potential award winning films are unleashed to a salivating public. 

There are still a lot of great films to be released this year.  The Dark Knight Rises, Django Unchained and The Hobbit are but three.  But there are also a bunch of high profile releases that I intend to stay clear of.  These are films that are still major releases for their given opening week-ends, but my desire to attend a screening sits at about a zero on the anticipation scale. 

There are 8 such films that I particularly have no desire in viewing.  Sure, I hope that I am found wrong in my expected disappointment, but from early internet chatter or trailer screenings, I just can’t see how I can get excited for these eight separate entries. 

In release order, the eight films I look to avoid are:

The Watch
Release Date: July 27, 2012
The cast of The Watch is at least interesting.  Vince Vaughn, Ben Stiller, Jonah Hill and Richard Ayoade star in a movie about four suburban dads that set up a neighborhood watch program defending their town from a potential alien invasion.  The trailers have me thinking that The Watch is more Evolution than it is Mars Attacks! and Vaughn and Stiller appear to be reprising characters that we have seen them play time and time again.  The trailer has gotten a few chuckles in mixed audiences but I am betting on this film being a ‘rainy afternoon when nothing else is on TV’ kind of movie rather than a must-see during its theatrical run.

Red Hook Summer
Release Date: August 10, 2012
Written and directed by Spike Lee, Red Hook Summer is another entry in Lee’s Brooklyn Films that started with Do the Right Thing back in 1989.  Lee hasn’t directed a film of relevance in nearly 20 years and his only real good film since Do the Right Thing has been Inside Man (2006).  The non-interesting synopsis of Red Hook Summer details a ‘middle-class boy from Atlanda who finds his worldview changed as he spends the summer with his deeply religious grandfather in the housing projects of Red Hook’.  Luckily it is being released in the summer and I will still have the opportunity to sit in my backyard and watch grass grow instead of venturing to my local multi-plex to overpay for another racial charged Lee flick.

Dredd 3D
Release Date: September 21, 2012
The original Judge Dredd starred Sylvester Stallone and was a dud at the box office back in 1995 (it really wasn’t that bad).  And since Hollywood has hit the repeat button on just about anything released between 1985-1995, it should come to no surprise that Dredd 3D was greenlit.  Taking over the role of the cop that proclaims “I am the law!” is Karl Urban and although early trailers make the reboot out to be more dark and violent, it just doesn’t grab you the way a Dark Knight or Spider-Man does. 

Frankenweenie
Release Date: October 5, 2012
There is a lot of talent involved in Frankenweenie that would suggest that this release is the one on our list that secures the biggest box office tally.  Disney is involved and Tim Burton is behind the camera directing.  Add voice work by Winona Ryder, Martin Short, Catherine O’Hara and Martin Landau and you should at least have interests peaked.  But a black and white stop motion picture about a resurrected dog is not something that gets our cranks motoring.  And although Burton’s last stop motion effort – The Corpse Bride – was a fun and entertaining trip, we don’t share the same excitement for the Weenie. 

Paranormal Activity 4
Release Date: October 19, 2012
We really enjoyed the original Paranormal Activity.  And we thought the two sequels were inferior yet still satisfying entries in the now tentpole franchise.  But after the third paranormal, we would have appreciated a little break from the franchise so that it doesn’t Saw itself into becoming quickly produced sequels trotted out every October.  Details of the storyline have yet to be made public, but PA4 will have Katie Featherstone back is some top billing capacity.  We’d rather the story go a different direction or even to a different family.  Instead, we are strapping ourselves in for another oscillating camera fan experience where the novelty of the premise has long worn off. 

Red Dawn
Release Date: November 21, 2012
The original Red Dawn was mindless fun starring Patrick Swayze and Thomas C. Howell back in 1984 and dealt with Russians invading the U.S. of A and a group of teenagers attempting to fight back.  This remake (which has been sitting on the shelf for over three years) keeps the idea the same, but this time the invaders come from North Korea.  There have been no trailers and I doubt stars Chris Hemsworth (Thor) or Josh Hutcherson (The Hunger Games) will likely even remember much of the shooting days when the film was in production in 2009.  I personally don’t care to see small town USA taken over by terrorists, tea baggers or teenagers. 

Les Miserables
Release Date: 14 December, 2012
Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe, Anne Hathaway.  Three big names.  But an all out musical based on Victor Hugo’s classic novel based in 19th-century France?  No thanks.  Sounds like Rock of Ages but without the fun.  I personally want to see my Jackman and Crowe as Wolverine and Maximus.  I just don’t care about a paroled singing prisoner who seeks redemption amongst the cobblestone and corsets of ancient Europe.

The Great Gatsby
Release Date: December 25, 2012
The Great Gatsby might be the first ever film from Leonardo DiCaprio that have little desire in screening.  Directed by Baz Luhrmann (Australia, Moulin Rouge), the film also stars Tobey Maguire, Carey Mulligan and Isla Fisher.  But early trailers zapped the energy out of the room like an atomic backdraft.  Is it a drama?  Is it a musical?  Is it a period piece?  Or maybe it is all the above.  No matter what The Great Gatsby ends up being classified, they will have to do better than the initial marketing campaign to get my wallet closer to the box office ticket window.